Thorns, Roses and Rosebuds - Via Jana WOOHOO!

 I just started again at "THE TWITTER".  I am so bad about keeping up with things like "Blogging" and "Twitter" and "Laundry".  Ok, I just threw that last one in to see if you were paying attention.  ANYWAYS..I have found a wonderful new group of people to follow at The Twitter and @Jana0926 is one of them.  She blogs like a goddess over at Jana's Thinking Place.  (go there, she is awesome)  On her blog, she created her very first MEME.  (Which I always pronounced ME-ME because I could...but the super cool man friend frowns upon me when I do it.  hehe!)  ANYWAYS...here is my post in response to Jana's meme.  You are welcome.  Maybe.





 THORN - Gosh.  Jana.  This is harder than it looked.  I have sat here just staring at the screen trying to come up with something to type.  OK.  Um.  THORN - I am going to have to go with, OMG.  I have no freaking clue.  Everything is just so great right now.  I know what hell I lived through in 2010 but without it, I would not be where I am right now, in this moment.  So we are going to skip this part right now.  Mm'kay?

ROSES -
1.  Having my son back in my life FULL TIME has been so wonderful.  It about tore me to pieces last year when I had to ask his Dad to take him.  I know it was the only option and it kept him safe, but I missed him every hour.  I am so thankful he is home now.

2.  My second ROSE is having real relationships again.  Especially with my friends and my family.  I was not aware at how cut off I was.  Spending time with my friends these last few months has been so rewarding.  Feeling the love from my family and knowing that they will be there for me NO MATTER WHAT is priceless.

ROSEBUDS-
1.  I look forward to seeing the relationship between myself and my super cool man friend blossom.  He makes everyday brighter and full of laughter and joy.

2.  I want to work on strengthening my friendships (like Jana is doing) both inside the computer and in my REAL life.

3.  And OMG I am totally looking forward to my cruise which departs in 16 days that my super cool man friend got me for my birthday!!  Sun and Sand, here we come!

My New Year's Resolutions

Yeah, I totally suck at this blogging thing.  OH well.  You still love me and that is all that matters.

Okay.  So I am going to make some New Year's Resolutions, Yo. 

1.  Continue NOT Smoking. - I don't know why, but I have been dying for a cigarette lately.  I mean, it has been 6 months!  At Christmas, I ran outside with the other *Smokers*, stole one drag and was all...EWWWWW.  So I don't know why I can't kick this craving to the curb.

2.  Continue making healthy choices when it comes to my body - Which basically means, continue NOT drinking soda.  Get all your water each day.  EXERCISE.  And watch what you put in your mouth.  Yay.

3.  Find a New Job.  One with security and stability.  I really want to go back into banking.  Let's see if we can make this happen.

4.  Continue to take things as they come with regards to the super cool man friend.  I swear to god, this is the most sane I have ever been in a relationship.  Months later, it is still effortless.  So I will choose to let it stay that way.  I will not get in my own way here.  I won't read into anything nor will I create problems that do not exist. 

5.  I will try to blog.  That is all I am saying, TRY.  Don't push me here.

Happy New Year!  I know 2011 HAS to be loads better than 2010.  Loveyameanit!

YAY!!! LOL!

If ya'll have never watched Crank Yankers...you so will not understand me.  I found episodes on Comedy Central on the internet and sat down and watched all the Special Ed ones.  So now I am hooked on the word YAY!!!!

Ten more days and I will finally be able to get back on my diet.  I am so excited this year for Thanksgiving (which will be my first loading day) because:
1.  It is the first year that I do not have to cook
2.  I will get to try Fried Turkey for the first time (don't be jealous)
and...
3.  I will get to spend a wonderful day with my BFF and her extended family and my new manfriend.

Woohoo!

I have a picture to post...but I am lazy.  So neener neener.  Maybe later.

So, how are ya?

I know.  I have been away.  I got a little frustrated with where I ended up.  I almost GAVE up.

I am in the maintenance phase of my diet.  I really have not been watching what I eat.  But I am excited to announce that I have not had a gain so I guess that is freaking awesome!

Most of you know that I am starting Round 2 on Thanksgiving Day.  I am ready to begin anew and try to lose another 20 lbs this time.  Of course I am hoping for 30 but I will be ecstatic with 20.

In other news...I met someone.  Yeah.  Weird.

You know, I was really going to just work on me this year.  Just take some time and get all right with myself.  Most of you know what my life has been like for the past few years.  Trauma and Drama.  Major!  I was done with that.  Finished.

That is why it is so weird that I find myself in a whole lotta like with someone new in my life.  We met on Sunday.  He took me out to dinner.  A Real DATE!  My first since the divorce.  It was really nice.  We have a lot in common.  We had great conversation and I laughed when a waiter (not ours) came up and joined in as it must have been very interesting.  Not an awkward moment the whole evening.

We have spent quite a bit of time with each other since Sunday.  He came to dinner Tuesday night and brought my kid a board game which he created himself.  How awesome is that?  We are hoping to play it this weekend sometime.  He is thoughtful and easy going.  No drama.  BEST PART!!  HE is friends with his ex-wife.  Even with no children involved.  It is not very often that you find that.

I know I made a promise to myself that I would not get involved seriously with someone for at least a year.  I know what kind of hell I lived through the past year and I will NEVER repeat it.  But I can't just pass him by and not even give it a chance.  I don't want to throw away something that might be great just because I am still raw from being burned.  I don't know.

You guys and girls don't have to remind me to be careful.  I am OVER careful.  I over analyze everything.  I question everything.  I never take anything spoken as truth.  It is painful.  But I am protecting myself and my child.  My life....my rules.  He is cool with that.  And I appreciate that very very much.

Right now, I am just going to enjoy the happiness he brings into my life daily with his enthusiasm and his joy for life and his love for animals and nature and art and Transformers.  I will just revel in the fact that he finds joy in my presence as well.  And that little things like reading a story together or cooking him dinner just make him so appreciative.  (*I just noticed my gratuitous use of the word appreciative in this post, great word*) And we will go from here.  Nothing will be forced.  We will just let life happen and in the end, see where we end up.  I deserve a little happiness dang it.  So I am not going to feel bad about breaking a promise to myself.

How are things with YOU?

VCLD Day 20

Weight - 250.6

I am .6 lbs away from being under 250.  I have one more day.  I think I can, I think I can.

VCLD Day 19

Weight - 251.4

Ok.  This is what I don't get.  I have lost 16 lbs.  WHERE?  My pants are still tight.  Yes, I can breathe in them but I am not dropping any sizes!  I don't know.  I am frustrated today.  Only two more days and I did not do so well this first round.  I guess I was hoping to see the same kind of losses that other people are posting.  30+ pounds.

Well, we will just have to hope for more on the next round.  Thank you for the support.  It is very appreciated.

VCLD Day 18

Weight - 251.8

VLCD Day 17

Weight - 252.8

I am slowly chipping away at it.  I WILL REACH MY GOAL BEFORE SATURDAY!  This is my mantra.

Saturday will be my last day in Phase 2.  I am moving to Phase 3 so I can start Phase 1 again (loading days) on Thanksgiving.  I did not lose as much as I was hoping for this round, but dang!  I lost some!

Lunch was Piccadillo.  I started eating it and remembered I forgot to add the tomatoes.  Oh well.  Lesson learned.

VLCD Day 16

Weight - 253.2

I had a yummy chicken salad for lunch.  I am hoping to make the stuffed zucchini for dinner.

VCLD Day 15

Weight - 253.6

I did great during the morning but when sunday night rolled around, I was exhausted.  So I made some chicken noodle soup for the boy and I ended up having two bowls myself.

VCLD Day 14

Weight - No Clue.  This is what happens when you stray from the blog for a day or two.

I did take pictures of my food.  I will post it a bit later.

VLCD Day 13

Weight - 255
Oh Yeah!  Dropped another 1.8 lbs!  6 lbs to reach my first goal!  Who is doing the happy dance all over the bathroom?  ME!  That's who!

Thank the Lawd for Smooth Move Tea!  And it was magically delicious!  I wish it was not medicinal! It was so yummy I could drink it every day!

Oh, and it worked!  Ha!  I know, I know!  TMI

Gosh, I am so glad the weekend is here but I am scared to death!  I do not want to cheat again.  It was a really big set back.  I know that I will be fine tonight.  I will be doing some work at my Mom's house.  So I will be busy and not tempted.  It is when I am alone that I find that little voice in my head saying...oh come on....you will never be skinny...why don't you have something that you will enjoy!  LOL  yeah, I never said I was not crazy.

I really appreciate all of the support I have been getting here lately.  Especially my BFF who always comments on my blog and tells me how proud she is of me and my awesome friend Brian (YOU Rock!).  Brian talks me down like I am a jumper on a ledge.  Cheerleader/Therapist/Drill Sergeant all in one.  Love it!  Thank you everyone!  It is so much better to have support that to hear negativity everyday!

Here is lunch, I made some chicken soup

And dinner.

VCLD Day 12

Weight - 256.8

TMI Alert.  Having a MAJOR problem with constipation.  I am thinking it is because of the cheese on the sinful pizza I devoured.  I went to the health food store and picked up some Smooth Move tea.  I sure hope it works.  This is quite painful.

For lunch I made a taco salad.

And for dinner I made Lemon Oregano Cod and Asparagus

VLCD Day 11

Weight - 257.0
Guess who lost .8 lbs?!?  Me!  That's who!

Oh gosh!  I am so glad that I am back on track!  I did EVERYTHING per protocol yesterday.  I ate both of my fruit servings, I had enough water to drown a small country, and I finished all of my lunch and dinner.

Gotta stick to it.  Do it the right way and I will see results.  I already had my apple this morning.  YUM!  I think I will bring a strawberry smoothie back to work with me and have it for a snack.

Mmmmm....eggs for lunch.  It looks kinda funky but it tasted so good!  I added half a tomato and some onion and scrambled them all together.

The for Dinner I made a mini meat loaf.  Sort of.  LOL!  It was tasty!

Ten more days until Phase 3.  I really hope I can lose 20 lbs before I move onto the phase.  Wish me luck!

VLCD Day 10

Weight - 257.8 No effing change.
Yes, I KNOW it can take up to THREE days to recover from a cheat.  But DANG IT!  I wanted to be recovered already.  I Is Sad.

Oh Well.  Just keep chugging on right?  I had my apple as a mid-morning snack.  I brought another back to work with me so maybe I can have one later this afternoon.  I am going to cut it up and sprinkle it with cinnamon and stevia and crumble my grissini on top and heat it all in the microwave.  I heard it is supposed to taste like apple crumble or sumthin.  Yum!

I feel silly.  I want so bad to see progress on the scale, right?  But I signed up at www.fitnesspal.com today and during the signup it kind of gives you some idea of what kind of progress you can expect from a normal diet.  It said that I could lose 6 pounds by November!  Six Whole Pounds!  Yeah, I could not find the button that said...Hey!  Buddy!  I lost that in a week!  Plus Some!  LMAO!

Seriously, though.  I really just need to see that scale move again to keep me motivated.  I have been drinking TONS of water and it is really showing today.  So I truly hope that I can get past the 10 lb mark tomorrow.  Again.

Today I had a burger for lunch again.

And then for dinner I made the Buffalo Chicken again...It was AWESOME this time.  AND HOT!

I had both of my fruits today as well!  Woohooo!  Cross your fingers for a loss tomorrow!

VCLD Day 9

Weight - 257.8
Told ya I was gonna pay for it.  Gained a pound.  I am trying to decide if it was worth it or not.

I have been sucking my water down as quickly as possible.  Trying to get back on track.  I can do it.  I know I can.  About to take my second dose of the day (HCG) now.  It will be a good day.  Hopefully I can get to the store tonight.  I need supplies.

It will be a good day.  It will be a good day.  It WILL be a good day.  Oh how I love Monday. Not.

This was lunch.  I have decided, I don't much care for shrimp anymore.  I had to force it down.

 

And for dinner...my asparagus frittata

Let's hope that tomorrow the scale is nicer.  I don't want to have to cry.

VLCD Day 8

Weight - 256.8
10.6 lbs gone in 7 days!  Woohooo!  Even with TOM!  I have heard alot of people complain that they stall or even gain during TOM!  I am so glad I am still on track and losing!

I am feeling a little better today.  I have a mild headache and I am really really hungry.  Like my stomach is growling kind of hungry.  Weird.  I think I will make myself a strawberry smoothie and calm that beast.

Today I am heading to a friends birthday party for her little girl.  Earlier in the week I was afraid to be around that much temptation but I think it will be fine.  I am loving how my body is melting away.  I can feel so much of a difference every morning.  HCG is amazing!  I am telling everyone...even strangers!  They probably think I am insane.  PLUS you don't get all the nasty side effects like diet pills.  LOVE IT!

Later that same day....
Yeah.  Well I was the epitome of self control at the party.  Nachos everywhere...fried food everywhere...a cake as big as a fricking football field.  I wanted to lick all the icing off that cake let me tell you.  NOT A BITE did I consume.  It was awesome!

Um.  But then I left the party.  And as I was driving home...I was STARVING.  Yeah.  And then I saw Little Caesars Pizza....yeah.  I had cash too.  So I stopped.  Hey, get the boy a pizza.  It is only $5.00!

I ate four pieces.  It was delicious!  But then I got all woozy and icky.  I know I am bad but sometimes, you gotta fall off the wagon so you can pick yourself back up and climb on board again.  Right?  I am sure I will pay for this tomorrow.  I should have had the cake instead.  LMAO!

VLCD Day 7

Weight - 257.8

Blah.  Blah blah blah.

I do not feel good.  I do not feel good in a boat, I do not feel good with a goat.  Ick Ick Ick.

Here is lunch

Don't expect much more from me today.  I am really tired and I just want to go to bed.  Sorry.

VCLD Day 6

Weight - 258.4
YESSSSSSS!!!!  The 250's!  It really worked!  I stood in front of the scale, I closed my eyes, I crossed my fingers and I said pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease....LMAO!

Halfway to my First Goal!  And I really think I can surpass the silent goal I made of 10 lbs within 7 days.  Woohoo!

Yeah, I was right yesterday.  My TOM came early.  This morning it arrived with a vengeance.  So no drops for me today.  I do have a bit of a headache but nothing that I can't live with.  It could also be due to this stupid cold that showed up out of nowhere yesterday.  Blah!

I bought a blender last night and it does not have a big old honking container...it has individual serving cups you use.  So this will be a real treat to blend up some smoothies with my fruit.  I can't wait.  I will post pics.  LOL!

Here is my lunch.  Do you see my smoothie?  Do ya?  Yum!

Here is Dinner.  I also made myself an "Orange Julius" later in the evening so I would have something when I took my boy for ice cream.

Let me just say this.  It sucks being sick.

VCLD Day 5

Weight - 260.6

I was really hoping to hit the 250's today.  Oh well Tomorrow is soon enough.

I know what the problem is.  I am not eating all my food.  The fruit especially.  I need to get back on track and eat all that damn fruit!  I am just so full!  It is hard.  But I will make it happen!

I had my Half of a Grapefruit this morning as a snack.  So I am on the right track.

I really want to see ten pounds gone by the 7 day mark.  I will cross my fingers and close my eyes and say pleasepleasepleaseplease.  Hey, it works in the movies!

I am waking up earlier and earlier.  Today I woke up at 5:30 am.  Luckily I was able to fall back asleep but I don't like being up that early.

Had a headache most of the evening last night.  And I was moody.  Like biting peoples heads off and then having a crying jag kind of moody.  Probably PMS.  I am not scheduled to have my TOM until the 11th but that means it can come anytime between now and then.  It will be interesting to see what happens when I try to do the diet without my HCG drops.  (You are supposed to refrain from taking the drops the first few days of your cycle.)  So sorry if this is TMI...but hey, this is MY blog.  I can say what I want.  So there.

I enjoyed my burger so much yesterday, that I had another today.

And then I got brave and actually took some BEFORE pics..yeah, but here is the problem...I have already lost some weight.  So we will call these...my 5 day pics.  LOL!  Caution, not for the weak of heart. 

Oh the loverly in the bathroom mirror pics!

I know YOU can't, but I can see a huge difference already.

Dinner.  Yeah.  Well, after work, I had to go to WalMart.  Then Hobby Lobby.  Got home at 7:30 pm and had to fix dinner for the boy.  I made him mac n cheese.  Then it is 8:00 pm.  I am horrible.  I had two spoonfuls of the mac n cheese.  I DID cut up some radish and eat it and I had a breadstick.  But that is it.  I know. I know.  I will get on track.  I MUST have dinner.  I WILL have dinner.  What?

VLCD Day 4

Weight - 261.4

Eh...was hoping for a bit more of a weight loss but hey, a loss is a loss, right?

So that brings the total to 6 pounds in 3 days.  Woohooo!

I have not had any problems so far on this diet.  I feel good, I am not moody or drained.  I am happy!  I wake up every day at 6:30 and I am so excited to get out of bed to go see what the scale says!  I have been on time to work (early even) every day this week and I am not HUNGRY!  It is a GOOD week so far!

Today I made a hamburger.  On the George Foreman grill of course.  It smelled heavenly as it cooked.  I seasoned my meat with chopped onion and garlic powder and a little black pepper.  I am so full right now that I skipped my fruit.  I bought some beautiful strawberries last night so I am thinking they will be dessert tonight.

Here is my lunch...

So, I spent some time this morning looking up a little thing called Chocolate Delight.  Oh.Emm.Gee.That had me drooling let me tell you.  And they are all saying they ate it during Phase 2 which I just don't see how this can be allowed in Phase 2.  Really.  Each piece is 197 calories people!  So, anyway, I think I will wait until Phase 3 to try this little recipe.  I would live on this stuff.  So no.  Can not do at this time.

I did think over my plan here.  Since I started this diet on October 1, I am going to end it on October 31.  That way, I can start my next round with Thanksgiving as my loading day.  Uh huh!  Pretty smart I am!  Plus, most people say you start to really drop off on the weight loss after the 25th day or so.  So I will be back on this diet in December and again in February if I still need to lose more. 

Have a great Wednesday...I will post my dinner later.  Cross your fingers that I lose a little more tomorrow than I did today.

Here is dinner.

I think I did something wrong because my Buffalo Chicken was not soupy at all.  It is very very tasty though!  I will be trying this again.

VLCD Day 3

Weight - 262.2
YES!  I lost almost THREE pounds yesterday!  WOOHOOOO!

I am so excited I could just pee!

I talked to my Mom this morning.  She is down to 240.  So she has lost over 25 lbs since 9/20/10 when she had the surgery.  But my diet takes WILLPOWER!  LOL!  And I have the WILLPOWER!  It is my new superhuman asset.  I am Willpower Woman!  (Please forgive...little loopy today...loving the weight loss, my pants fit!  I am not being cut in half when I sit down anymore.)

I can feel my energy returning.  I was so drained the first couple of days.  I just wanted to sleep. All.The.Time.  So this is much better.

I will update later with my lunch and dinner dishes.  It helps me to share them with you.  That way, I have to be accountable.  I spent a great deal of time yesterday looking up some recipes and I found a couple that I want to try.  One is a stuffed pepper recipe that looked divine and the other is Buffalo Chicken Sorta.  It is modified to be allowed on the diet but it looks yummy!  And seeing those wings last night totally got me craving them.  So I will try it out.

Til Then!

Okay, here is lunch.  I have not decided on dinner as of yet.  It will be one of the two listed above.  LOL!

And this was my dinner.  I have never prepared stuffed peppers before so this was fun to try.

Can't wait to see what tomorrow brings!!



VLCD Day 2

Weight - 265
Yup!  I lost 2.4 lbs!  Woohoo!  So take THAT naysayers!  LOL!

Oh I lost another 167 lbs this morning by way of my Divorce...but that is another story.  LOL!

It is ridiculous to think that when it finally comes time to eat...that it would be difficult to ingest all 500 calories.  BUT IT IS!  I have to force myself to finish.  And last night I didn't eat my apple at dinner.  I just could not take another bite. 

Today I cut up part of my apple and put it in with my lettuce and chicken for a salad.  It was tasty.  But once I was finished with the salad, I could not eat the rest of the apple.  Very weird.  Anyways, here is my lunch.

I love love love my George Foreman Grill!  In minutes!  I have food!  Yay!

Ok.  So I took my son to the fair tonight.  I made it through (with a little help from my friends) but I did not eat dinner.  And now it is too late to eat.  So I had my grissini but I am so tired I just want to go to bed.  This is why I need to plan my meals in advance.  So I don't miss them.  That cannot be good when I am eating so few calories as it is.  I will do better tomorrow.  I promise.

Phase 2 - VLCD Day 1

Weight - 267.4

See!  I did good during my loading phase.  I only gained 1.4 lbs!  Woohoo!

If you did your loading phase right...it is supposed to keep you from getting those annoying hunger pangs.

Well, I must have done it right!  I really was not hungry.  Ok.  I was HUNGRY but I think it was a mind thing.  You know when you can't have something then all of a sudden you really really want it??  I did not NEED to eat.  My mind was trying to play tricks on me and told me I really wanted that stuff that was bad.

But I was a good girl.  Here is what I made for lunch. 

Remember, you can have 100 grams of protein from the list, 2 cups of a vegetable from the list, one grissini (breadstick) and one fruit from the list.  Then you can have the same for dinner but you need to choose a different protein.

And here is my dinner.

The hardest part was having to cook for my kid and smelling his dinner and wanting it!  But I want to be thin more.  I have to keep telling myself.  I can do this.  I know I can.

OHHHH....here is the fish.  His name is Max.

Ok.  I gotta go tell my brain that I am NOT hungry!  Overall...today was a success.  Yes, I want that bad food but that is a habit I am going to break.  I will teach myself to eat right.  I can do it!

HCG Diet - Day 2 Loading (Gorge Yourself) Day

Weight - 268  lbs.

It is ok.  You are supposed to gain some during your loading period.  Ugh.

I was talking to my BFF last night.  It just feels so wrong to be stuffing myself with all this unhealthy food when I am trying to lose weight.  I feel so GUILTY!

So tomorrow is my first VLCD day (very low calorie diet).  In order for this to work for me, I need to plan in advance what I will be preparing for each meal.  And in some cases, preparing them in advance.  That way, there is NO CHANCE I will cheat and pull into a drive thru for some TO GO food.

Not much to share today.  I am gonna stuff myself.  Oh joy.

On a different note, my kid has had two great weeks in a row at school.  So I think I will reward him.  He has been asking for a pet.  I think we will start out small.  Like a goldfish.  And maybe a movie.  Buttered Popcorn has TONS of fat!  Ha!

HCG Diet - Day 1 Loading (Gorge Yourself) Day

Starting Weight - 266 lbs
(oh god.  Did I actually just tell someone how much I REALLY weighed?)
This weight is kinda fun to post up because two weeks ago I was pushing 280.  I don't know where it went but damn I am glad it is gone!

I took my first dose of HCG this morning.  I have to take it four times a day.  The schedule I worked out is 6:30 am, 10:30 am, 2:30 pm, and 6:30 pm.  I took all my measurements last night (so I can see how many inches I lose) and wrote them in my journal.

I now know what everyone was talking about.  You think that it will be easy and fun to gorge yourself with all the bad food you know you shouldn't eat but love.  I stopped into Sonic this morning for French Toast Sticks.  One of my absolute favorites.  I don't know if it is the HCG that is working or if it is all in my head but, I was only able to eat two of them.  I had to force the second one down. 

I am going to eat every two hours today and tomorrow starting at 8:00 am and ending at 8:00 pm.  I bought high fat goodies such as black olives, bean dip (yum!), peanut butter, corn chips, etc.  Tonight I will have either a cheeseburger or pizza.  (If I can stuff em down!).  I saw other people were also drinking soda, I cannot bring myself to take a step back.  I am that addicted to the stuff.  If I have one...I will have 50.  So, water for me.  Maybe a beer or two tonight as alcohol is forbidden on the diet.

Ok then...I am off to find something to eat!

Tomorrow is the first day...

...of the rest of my life.  Ha!

I am fed up.  I am sick and tired of being the fat girl in my group of friends.  I don't want to be liked for my personality...LMAO! 

I have been working to making myself healthy.  The first Sunday in June, I quit smoking.  On September 12th, I quit drinking soda (oh how I miss my beloved Dr. Pepper!).  Now, it is time for a diet.

JOY!

After loads and loads (and loads) of research, I have decided to try the HCG Diet.  I am not going to do the injections though, I have opted for the drops.  I ordered my drops from www.pureh2o2forhealth.com.  I found so many internet sites selling HCG drops that had NO HCG in them.  I used this source because it came highly recommended by my Sister-In-Law. 

My drops arrived yesterday, but I think that by starting on the first day of the month it will just make tracking things a bit easier.  Don't you agree?

I am going to use this blog as my daily journal.  Mm'kay?  I am NOT going to cheat.  There is no reason that I cannot stick to this diet for the next 43 days. 

So, look out world!  There is a skinny girl inside me and she is clawing her way out!

My Goals:

I want to set realistic (baby) goals.  That way, it is easier to see progress.
FIRST GOAL!!!!
Weigh 249 lbs (which will totally break the 250 mark since I have not been below 250 in AGES)
or
Reach a point where the jeans that I am wearing today will absolutely NOT STAY UP.  These are not tight jeans and I can almost pull them on and off without unbuttoning them....so this is a realistic goal.

Wish me luck people.  I am gonna need it!